Friday, December 21, 2007

where did the time go?

Every year at Christmas we start the season with good intentions. We make a list of all of the gifts we need to get. Lay a plan of all of the traditions we would like to continue. We start off strong, but end up rushing around trying to fit in everything we had hoped for, often missing the reasons we started tradtions.

Tonight, we fit in one of my favorite traditions of all. Baking Christmas cookies. This says a lot because I hate to bake. Steve actually calls me a tornado in the kitchen, destroying everything in my path. Regardless, it is a highlight of the Christmas season. Tonight seemed extra special. It was the first Christmas that Gibson actually helped me make the cookies. He has 'helped' me in the past, but we all know how much 'help' our children can be at times. After many reminders of why we don't stick our fingers in the dough and why it is important to cover our mouth when we cough, we were on our way. He stood proudly on his stool beside me, confident and ready for each task. As many times as I wished my boys would be independent, I found myself watching Gibson with mixed feelings. Thrilled at his accomplishements and self worth. Humbled that he did not need me. These feelings have been surfacing a lot recently. Also surfacing is the gift of Gibson wanting to cuddle because he is cold, sitting on my lap and asking me to tell him a story and bedtime stories sharing the same pillow. Tonight I am thankful for all of these moments and trying to preserve them so that one day I won't wonder, 'where did the time go?'

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