Friday, August 1, 2014

When You Don't Want To Go Home

My children are dancing on my last nerve.

I am exhausted.


And, can't find the pocket where I stored the good of summer for when this day struck.

I was supposed to work today. The office day was canceled.

My kids and my sitter all think that I am at work. I didn't have the energy to tell them otherwise.

Since 8:30am, I have been wandering, and I am not a wanderer. I often feel guilt with wandering, wondering if I am spending these few sacred hours away from my children wisely.

The pressure of what to do with the first 5 free hours I have had in the last two months nearly kills me each time.

Not today.

Today, I feel empty.


And, I am just going with it and giving myself grace.

My initial morning wandering lead me on the hunt for a cardigan to wear to an unseasonably cold summer wedding this weekend.

I never did find a cardigan, I can't say that I looked that hard.

I did, however, drink Rwandan coffee loaded with half-n-half - while it was still warm, stop at a garage sale, drove with my windows down, and picked myself fresh flowers.

It's okay to wander, to buy polka dot measuring cups that you don't really need at a clothing boutique, to peruse books at a local bookstore and walk away with two you may never read. It's okay to purchase a charming gray and white striped rug just because you like it but don't necessarily love it.

And, it's okay not to want to go home to your kids yet.



  1. Yes, sweetie, it's definitely okay. God gives us days like that when He knows we need them. Precious gifts - a good summer day.

  2. ummm...did you see my post from last Saturday when my hubby gave me a "get out of jail free" card and I spent the night ALONE in a hotel room. ALL BY MYSELF. so wander away. your heart is always home. but that doesn't mean you don't need a little bit of a breather, sweet one. Jesus had his mountains...just sayin. love and hugs. ( case no one has told you lately, you are a terrifically, fantabulous, beautiful - inside'n out - momma).

  3. Yes! Love this. Sometimes the hardest person to give grace to is ourselves -- good for you! Sounds like a great day.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...