Thursday, January 30, 2014


My heart was first open to adoption as I stumbled upon adoption blogs.  On each blog I found there were stories of traveling to pick up a child that needed a home.  I would check in each day and even each hour on the Gotcha Days.  I would cry tears for people I had never met, and I would root for them while sitting in my pj's, in front of my computer, halfway around the world.

With each journey I followed, each family eventually returned home.....  and I would still check their blog each day.  But each and every time, they would leave me hanging.  There would seldom be a follow up, and if I was lucky I could see a picture of the sweet little one who stole a piece of my heart.

Well, now I get it.  It is nearly seven months after bringing Finley home, and I have joined the ranks of all those who have gone before me.

Life has gone on, Finley has adjusted so very well, and there have been many moments deserving of a blog post.

The truth is, however, the fog of what the last year has held for our Party of Five is just lifting.

The truth is that the last seven months have held equal parts indescribable joy and deep grieving. Someday, I hope to write more about each, but for now, I think both the joy and grief need to rest in our hearts as we continue to explore all that they mean.

Today, however, I felt the need to write.

To write for Gibson and Elliott and Finley and anyone else who is called to our story.

Today, these two, who were born only 3 days apart on two separate continents, found themselves running around together, laughing and playing together, and calling each other's names.

And, I found myself in complete AWE... the only word that comes close to encompassing God's grace and His plan.

There I sat, with two pretty cool two year old's, as they had conversations about my "coppee" as they said, please and thank you, as they laughed big belly laughs, and ran to each of their Mama's at the end of the morning.

These two already have such deep stories, stories of abandonment and heartache ..... but God made it clear this morning and over the last seven months that He is redeeming these two stories, and that He has been since the beginning.


  1. Well written. Lucy understands only as well as a 6 year old can. she loves her photo book from our trip to bring her home, the pages are falling out. However, just the other night she was asking deeper questions. Oh the heartache they will have to process.

    Lucy talks about Finely often. She knows they have a special bond that not all kids will have.

  2. You are completely on track when you say, "He is redeeming these two stories, and that He has been since the beginning", plus yours as a family. I pray for you and your family that has grown in numbers and love.
    Love you tons,
    Aunt Kris

  3. Love this post. And the hearts of those two mamas! :)

  4. Perhaps that grief and joy is why I weep and grin while I read this story. God has prepared your family for sweet finley and all her friends by reminding you of your own joy, grief and his redemption of your and Steve's story. Love you all!


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